I’ve been diagnosed about a year and a half ago, but I’ve been Bipolar for as long as I can remember. It is not easy, let me tell you that much. It’s a challenge every day whether you’re in the limited state of “normality”, depression, or hypomania. For the past couple of months it’s been hard to get out of the house and I can bury myself inside for two weeks straight without feeling the sun brush my skin, or breath fresh air into my lungs. The depressing side of it is that I am okay with it and I know that this will go on for a while (the entire winter to be more exact). My days are played out by procrastination. I think about the things that I have to do but I get so overwhelmed in thinking about it all that I end up never getting to do any of it. It’s depressing. All of it. For a normal person it’s pathetic, but what I’ve learned comforts me: Bipolars do that, are like that. I get overwhelmed over almost everything in life. Anxiety gets the best of me, unfortunately.
I was in denial for a long time. I was ashamed to be put in a box, to be given a label. But the truth of it all is that there is nothing to be ashamed of. I have a chemical imbalance in my brain and that is NOT my fault. I just live life differently than everybody else. I think outside the box, I am extremely talented, and I truly believe that God made me like this for a purpose. Might it be to help others cope, I would be honored to help make the lives of others a bit better because of what I went through. If that is my mission on earth, I want to fulfill it to the last drop of life within me. I just feel honored to know that God chose me to help you.
SerendipitousMind 